Sunday, December 25, 2005
The Least Famous Reindeer of All....
The source that added eight individually-named reindeer to the then-nascent Santa Claus legend was the poem "A Visit from Saint Nicholas" (now more commonly known as "The Night Before Christmas"), first published in 1823. A portion of the poem read as follows:
The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of midday to objects below;
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer.
With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be Saint Nick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name.
"Now Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on, Cupid!
on Dunder and Blixem!
To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now, dash away! dash away! dash away all!
Who are those last two reindeer? 'Dunder and Blixem'? Aren't they supposed to be 'Donner and Blitzen'? - Check out Snopes for more.
Sunday, December 18, 2005
Scientology, the world's funniest pseudo-religion.
"At these higher levels - and at a potential cost of hundreds of thousands of dollars - Scientologists learn Hubbard's secret theory of human suffering, which he traces to a galactic battle waged 75 million years ago by an evil tyrant named Xenu.
According to court documents made public by The Times in the 1980s, Hubbard espoused the belief that Xenu captured the souls, or thetans, of enemies and electronically implanted false concepts in them to keep them confused about his dirty work. The goal of these advanced courses is to become aware of the trauma and free of its effects.
At Cruise's high level of training, ex-members say, devotees also are charged with actively spreading the organization's less secretive beliefs and advancing its crusades, including Hubbard's deep disdain for psychiatry, a profession that once dismissed his teachings as quackery." - L.A. Times
I love Scientology. I was going to say you can't make up stuff like that, but it's apparent that you can.
Just to review...
Psychiatry - Bad.
Xenu - Bad, but perfectly logical.
Tom Cruise - Rapidly closing in on Michael Jackson's title as the weirdest man on earth.
You have to wonder how long it will be (if, in fact, it hasn't happened already) someone will claim innocence by reason of Xenu in a court of law.
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Funny, but wrong.
A Christmas Gory
Sick, Sad World - Tacos & $5.00 Poison
A 500-pound man in Seminole County, Fla., was arrested Tuesday on suspicion of scamming fast-food restaurants out of large amounts of milk shakes and tacos, according to a Local 6 News report. - Local 6
A Waffle House restaurant worker in Georgia was arrested on charges of allegedly paying a homeless man $5 to drink a poisonous cocktail of chemical cleaning solution that left him in critical condition, according to police.
...
"What did this poison do to his system?" Leo's sister, Linda, said. "It was acid, it ate through his esophagus and they don't know how much more damage. It ate his gums, his tongue. He's on a ventilator right now." - Local 6
Friday, December 16, 2005
Santa's Tip Well
"Santas do tip well," said Goedert, a Reno tax attorney. "Probably because we're all over 30 and do other jobs."
The idea sounds pretty simple. A few friends, looking for something fun to do the weekend before Christmas, dress in Santa suits and hit bars, as many as they can from 7 p.m. Saturday until sunup Sunday, or until they've had enough, whichever comes first. - RGJ
Next year I'm there.
Return to Oz - Scissor Sisters
There once was a man
Who had a little too much
Time on his hands
He never stopped to think
That he was getting older
When his night came to an end
He tried to grasp for his last friend
And pretend
That he could wish himself health
On a four-leaf clover
He said is this the return to Oz?
The grass is dead
The gold is brown
And the sky has claws
There's a wind-up man
Walking round and round
What once was Emerald City's
Now a crystal town.
It's three o'clock in the morning
You get a phone call
From the queen with a hundred heads
She says they're all dead
She tried the last one on
It couldn't speak, fell off
And now she just wanders the halls
Thinking nothing
Thinking nothing at all.
She says is this the return to Oz?
The grass is dead
The gold is brown
And the sky has claws
There's a wind-up man
Walking round and round
What once was Emerald City's
Now a crystal town.
The wheelies are cutting pavement
And the Skeksis at the rave meant
To hide deep inside
Their sunken faces
And their wild rolling eyes
But their callous words reveal
That they can no longer feel
Love or sex appeal
The patchwork girl has come to cinch the deal.
To return to Oz
We've fled the world
With smiles and clenching jaws
Please help me friend from coming down
I've lost my place now and it can't be found
Is this the return to Oz?
The grass is dead
The gold is brown
And the sky has claws
There's a wind-up man
Walking round and round
What once was Emerald City's
Now a crystal town.
Hopelessly addicted to this song...the whole album really.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Things I didn't know...(Caesar Salad)
Most historians believe that Caesar salad honors restaurateur Caesar Cardini (1896-1956), who invented it in Tijuana, Mexico in 1924 on the Fourth of July weekend. It is said that on this busy weekend, Cardini was running low on food and he put together a salad for his guests from what was left over in the kitchen. His original recipe included romaine, garlic, croutons, and Parmesan cheese, boiled eggs, olive oil and Worcestershire sauce. The original salad was prepared at tableside. When the salad dressing was ready, the romaine leaves were coated with the dressing and placed stem side out, in a circle and served on a flat dinner plate, so that the salad could be eaten with the fingers.
In 1926, Alex Cardini joined his brother, Caesar, at the Tijuana restaurant. Alex, an ace pilot in the Italian Air Force during World War I, added other ingredients, one of which was anchovies, and named the salad Aviator's Salad" in honor of the pilots from Rockwell Field Air Base in San Diego. It is reported that Alex's version became very popular, and later this salad was renamed "Caesar Salad." Caesar was said to be staunchly against the inclusion of anchovies in this mixture, contending that the Worcestershire sauce was what actually provided that faint fishy flavor. He also decreed that only Italian olive oil and imported Parmesan cheese be used in the dressing. - What's Cooking America
Monday, December 12, 2005
Wagon's Ho! Reno!
The exodus of California continues...
"Annie Dunn first met neighbor Debbie Barber as she was packing a truck in front of her home in San Jose. It turned out both were moving -- to the same place: Reno.
Two years later and 220 miles away, the Dunns are still neighbors with the Barbers, only this time in ArrowCreek, an enclave reminiscent of Bay Area suburbs like Danville, with wide, meandering streets and large stuccoed houses perched on the arid hills overlooking Reno. " - SFGate.com
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
Things I didn't know...
A collection of jellyfish is known as a smack.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Stocking full of knives
Via Headlines
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Commander Adama sings!
Saturday, December 03, 2005
Glow in the dark flowers.....Duuuude.
AMSTERDAM, Netherlands - A Dutch company began selling "Glowing Flowers" - freshly cut glow-in-the-dark roses and chrysanthemums - on Friday in what it claimed was a first.
The flowers appear white in regular light but emit an eerie green glow for several hours in the dark, FloraHolland BV said in a statement.
...
"The market needs fresh ideas and innovation, and Glowing Flowers fit into the 'bling bling' trend," the company said, referring to a fad for wearing copious jewelry inspired by rap musicians. - Yahoo
When I first read this my first thought was, "this has got to be the work of potheads." Then I noticed the origination of the article. It all makes sense now. Someone go fetch me a black light.
And remember kids, glowing flowers fit into the bling bling trend, don't let the squares tell you any different.
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