Saturday, September 27, 2003
If I had a Hammer
Went to the dentist today, came home nice and discombobulated so I crash out. An hour later I am woken up to the sounds of my upstairs neighbors sacrificing a cat to the tune of Famous Blue Raincoat. The fog lifts and I realize that's no cat, it's a human. I'm three steps from Captain Willard with these cats. First their refrigerator breaks and they don't bother to tell anyone, while I sit and wonder why there's water dripping through my living room ceiling. Not they're pissing all over Leonard Cohen. I'm a pretty mellow guy, but I can only be pushed so far. Just because you learned a chord or two on your acoustic guitar does not mean you can sing. Just because you have locks on your door doesn't not mean you are safe from an increasingly insane downstairs neighbor.
"When I was here, I wanted to be there, when I was there all I could think of was getting back into the jungle."-Capt. Willard
Tags: neighbors, annoying, m/a/z/e
Friday, September 26, 2003
About 134,000 workers lost their jobs in 1,258 mass layoffs nationwide last month, up from the 128,103 employees who were fired in 1,248 such actions in August 2002, the bureau said. -Washington Post
Wednesday, September 24, 2003
Michael (Michael) Moore (Moore).
Saw Michael Moore last night, that was kinda cool. The eight or so smart Americans vs. the lone dumb Canadian was pretty cool-for those who missed it, the Canadian won. I could have done without the creepy folk music in the beginning and the constant echo though (Hello, Hello, I'm, I'm Michael, Michael, Moore, Moore). It was a trip to be in the now smaller looking Memorial Coliseum, but it was cool. That's all I have to say. Now go. Be free. Make some flavored coffee to celebrate this moment in your lives.
Tags: michael moore, echo, m/a/z/e
Tuesday, September 23, 2003
Ich Hasse Leute
One of the fun things about call centers is reactions of people. A customer calls in all sweet and nice, you deny them the free ride they are looking for (right or wrong) and they turn into vipers inside of twenty seconds. The you have the exact opposite, people raging on about whatever perceived injustice only to turn into a pussycat when you throw them a bone. About 80% of the calls go one way or the other, rarely do you have a sane transaction. If these are representatives of the greater pool of US citizens 80% of the country is in dire need of a frontal lobotomy. Just as everyone has a seven foot dick or shapely curves online, people love to rage against the machine over the phone. How many of them would do that in person? At least then I'd have a shred of respect for them. An asshole is tangible, real, solid. A yelling whiny voice ranting over the phone is like a republican president, transparent and all too easily pitied.
Sunday, September 21, 2003
Jailhouse Rock
He also said that Daigle occasionally dressed up as Elvis and put on convincing impressions.
"For the amount of violence that was done there I just can't imagine it was coming from this man," said Reed.-The Daily Item
Insert your punchline here.
Aftermath
We have survived massive hangovers. My hopes and dreams of a gold tooth were dashed by the cruel twist of fate and a less than satisfactory diagnosis by the dentist. As a consolation prize my eyebrow is now pierced, more cranium accessories as Mitch Hedberg would say. Somewhere along the line I decided it would be a good idea to do a whole bunch of nitrous oxide, the validity of that theory is still up for debate. And so it ends, I'm 32. Yippee Skippy.
Thursday, September 11, 2003
Unions, Theories, Petroleum
The union busters stopped by my work today, that was weird. Meanwhile I've been testing my theory on the brighter side of hangovers-there'll be an entry about the results shortly. And to top the day off we checked out a house next to a rather spooky looking petroleum plant. Strange days indeed, most peculiar mama.
Monday, September 08, 2003
Eyeball in my Martini
The current vehicle play list is obviously the work of a deranged mind. We all walk nimbly on the fine line between brilliance and bad taste.
1. Dandy Warhols-Thirteen Tales from Urban Bohemia
2. ZZ Top-Greatest Hits
3. Spearhead-Home
4. The Pogues-If I Should Fall From Grace with God
5. Ramones-Adios Amigo's
6. Ministry-Psalm 69
7. Soundtrack-Music From Northern Exposure
8. Iggy Pop-Nude & Rude: The Best Of
9. Bruce Springsteen-Greatest Hits
10. Leonard Cohen-More Best Of
11. White Zombie-La Sexorcisto: Devil Music Vol. 1
12. The Jesus & Mary Chain-Hate Rock 'N' Roll
13. The Who-The Very Best Of
14. Squirrel Nut Zippers-Hot
15- Danzig-Self Titled
16. Dwight Yoakam-Last Chance For A Hundred Years
17. AC/DC-Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap
18. DGeneration-Through The Streets
19. U2-Zooropa20. Snoop Dogg-Doggystyle
21. Sonic Youth-Goo
22. Cinderella-Greatest Hits
23. Dandy Warhols-Welcome to the Monkey House
24. U2-Atchung Baby
Tags: playlist, m/a/z/e
Sunday, September 07, 2003
The Wanderer
Words-Bono Vox-Johnny Cash
I went out walking through streets paved with gold. Lifted some stones, saw the skin and bones of a city without a soul. I went out walking under an atomic sky. Where the ground won't turn and the rain it burns like the tears when I said goodbye. Yeah I went with nothing, nothing but the thought of you. I went wandering.
I went drifting through the capitals of tin. Where men can't walk or freely talk and sons turn their fathers in. I stopped outside a church house where the citizens like to sit. They say they want the kingdom. but they don't want God in it. I went out riding, down that old eight lane. I passed by a thousand signs looking for my own name. I went with nothing but the thought you'd be there too. Looking for you.
I went out there in search of experience. To taste and to touch and to feel as much as a man can before he repents. I went out searching. Looking for one good man. A spirit who would not bend or break, who would sit at his father's right hand. I went out walking with a bible and a gun. The word of God lay heavy on my heart, I was sure I was the one.
Now Jesus, don't you wait up. Jesus, I'll be home soon. Yeah I went out for the papers, told her I'd be back by noon. Yeah I left with nothing but the thought you'd be there too. Looking for you Yeah I left with nothing. nothing but the thought of you. I went wandering.
Wednesday, September 03, 2003
Have you hugged your employer?
The world's approximately 150,000 call centers--referred to by some employees as "high-tech sweatshops"--have never represented the ideal work environment. Employees understand that phone work is "expected to suck," according to James Clark, a former customer-relationship manager at Sitel. "In general, you expect it to be a paycheck job," he says. "But Sitel was the worst of the worst."
Sitel denied WW's request to tour the Hillsboro site, but according to current and former employees, the building is filled with rows of long desks; workers sit on both sides of the desks and face each other. Each work area is roughly four feet long and includes a telephone and a computer.-Willamette Wreck
WW may or may not be talking about my current employer. As such, I may or may not be able to verify the rows upon rows of very long desks. If the company mentioned above was indeed my employer I would still be too new to make a judgment call on employee treatment. But I have worked in various call centers before (Stream, US Crank, etc.). If you've worked one, you've worked them all. Could Sitel be the worst of the worst? Doubtful. You have to realize in the call center game it's like comparing a gunshot wound to the left leg to one on the right. Sure there may be subtle nuances between the two, but that doesn't hide the fact you've got a hole in your leg.
Tuesday, September 02, 2003
The Sanity Assassin.
I had my very own Office Space moment last Friday when at graduation (yes, graduation-my work thinks it's a school) my fellow classmates and I were introduced to our eight bosses. Eight. Of course they weren't called "bosses," they're our "support staff." Did I mention we also have TPS reports? If someone tries to steal my stapler...watch out.
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