Tuesday, November 25, 2003
New Comedy Show on CSPAN
Watching CSPAN this morning I saw the most hilarious comedy routine.
Act I is Senator Rick Santorum (R), Pennsylvania. He expounded at great length on many subjects, closing with the horrors the Massachusetts courts are committing by ruling that gay marriage is legitimate and protected under that annoying little equal rights rule. Furthermore, by ruling the way they did these non-elected judges are circumventing the constitutional process our forefathers intended and something must be done right away or all States will be forced to recognize these un-natural unions as legally binding. Oh the horror!
He presented a solution that would limit marriage to a woman and a man. Just amend the Constitution to specifically define marriage; one male, one female for the sole purpose of providing a stable family to protect and raise children.
The only reason for a marriage, according to Senator Santorum, is to provide a family for kids to be brought up properly. In his eyes this obviously eliminates faggots, queers, and pelt-lickers. While he didn't actually say those words you could tell he was thinking them and a few others. The clear sub-text was that these freaks and sinners can't make babies together and should therefore not be granted the right to have their love and commitment to one another recognized under the law.
Act II - Senator Larry Craig (R) of Idaho playing the unwitting straight man. After graciously assuring Senator Santorum the extended wait for him to yield the floor was no bother, Senator Craig brought up an issue of great personal concern to him. November is National Adoption Month and as an adoptive father of three this is a subject near and dear to his heart.
The numbers presented by Senator Craig on children who haven't got a stable and loving family were truly appalling. These kids are shifted about in the foster care system like unwanted trash until they "age out" at 18 years old and are then cut loose with no further support system.
In order to ensure the future well being of the thousands and thousands of parentless children, willing couples are needed to love them and raise them as if they were there own. Loving, committed couples in long term relationships who have the resources and are highly motivated to create families for them.
Sadly, I am sure Senators Santorum and Craig don't even realize their comedy genius.
- Molliwogg
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